Our Free Flowing Anger
Befriending Our Anger
Our Instinctive Response
Anger is an instinctive response to boundaries being crossed. To notice our anger we need to name it as it arrives.
- When we repress anger we abandon ourself, having no apathy for ourself or others, we can easily fall into depression.
- Expressing our anger creates harsh boundaries, isolation and cycling rages that accelerates most issues.
- Repressing and expressing our emotions accelerates the outer drama and lead us away from ourself and others.
Every Present Anger
Anger is often present when there is something for us to protect, as a response to a perceived threat to oneself or to another. We usually need to restore our boundaries to feel safe. Anger can also be a response to frustration. Anger can be a secondary emotion to fear as well.
Being a hardwired basic emotions anger is innate, universal, automatic, and fast. Triggering our unthinking, instinctive responses, our first response to a situation. Each emotion corresponds to a distinct neurological circuit.
Anger As A Guide
When our hardwired anger is present we can use it for guidance.
When we pause for a moment to check in;
- Sensing~Noticing in your body that you are having an emotion/feeling.
- Naming~Choosing an accurate name for the emotion/feeling.
- Evaluating~Checking in about how you feel about having the emotion/feeling.
- Acting~Deciding how to cope, use or deal with the emotion/feeling.
When we notice it, name it, evaluate it and deal with our inner world of emotions, without reacting outwardly in anger we begin to use our inner wisdom.
Sometimes primary emotions disappear as fast as they appear. They’re replaced by secondary emotions, complicating the situation often making it difficult to understand what is really going on.
Our basic fear response is so primitive and so automatic it’s unconscious and uncontrollable, more like a reaction rather than a deliberate action.
Our emotions become a neurology chemical bath, creating a complex chain of chemistry to the brain and throughout the body. As emotions join in the fray we ride the inner wave of chemistry scanning for clarity, rather than reacting unconsciously to the anger. It really is an inside job.
Free Flowing Anger
When anger flows freely, without being repressed or expressed; it helps maintain our boundaries, our inner convictions, and our healthy detachment. Free flowing anger allow you to laugh compassionately at yourself. It provides a guide to set your boundaries mercifully. Both actions arise from an inner strength and honorable self-definition anger imparts.
As a practice rather than exploding or repressing, we can speak our truth by resetting our boundaries in healthy ways, which will protect us and our relationships.
How To Switch Off An Angry Person
It’s one thing to understand your own emotional chemistry. How do you switch off an angry person? Nadia Persun, PhD offers some suggestions.